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Sunday, January 16, 2011

Day 3 - First Love

Well my first love has to be Dr. Pepper... I mean I hardly ever go a day without having one... Kidding... kinda :)

But seriously....

This post might be a difficult one for me... but here it goes.

Strangely enough, I was thinking about this very topic a couple of nights ago while I listened to the speaker at our church's Disciple Now. He started by asking the students if they thought they knew what love meant and several of them raised their hands. From there, he didn't try to tell them that they were wrong or they really didn't know what love was, he simply said that our idea of love changes over time. When we are young, love is for our parents, siblings, and other members of our family. It's also used to describe how we feel about ice cream, pizza, swimming, and presents. Love is just a feeling that we are taught to use for things that we enjoy. Then a few years later, we discover the opposite sex and we might have a few "serious" relationships and our view of love changes again. We think that love is about kisses, hugs, love notes, late night phone-calls (I guess texts would be more correct theses days), and prom dates. I'm not going to lie and say that I didn't fall into this very category in high school and even college. I dated a guy for almost three years that I thought I would "love" him forever. I won't ever deny that I cared for him on a deeper level than my other friends, but neither one of us really knew what love was truly about. [I can say that without reservation since both of us are very happily married these days.] Anyway, college was about the same for me... I wasn't the dating type and I only got into a relationship that I could see myself in for the long run. There was a time right after college where I hit, what I thought to be, rock-bottom in relationship world. I remember telling my mom that I was tired of being alone and that the true desire of my heart was to be married and eventually have children. Her response? If that was the true desire of my heart, then I needed to pray about it. Me, being the most incredibly impatient person that I am, did NOT like this response because I was already tired of waiting... so why should I wait some more. I didn't want to be an older bride, and eventually an older mom. But, low and behold, the dream I had was too small for the man upstairs... His plan was already in effect and within a week, I was re-united with the guy that I would soon call my husband. I can't say that from that day on it was candy and roses because it definitely was not. He and I were what I like to call "damaged goods." We had trust issues because we had both been burned before and that took a toll on us for a long time. BUT, when you wake up one day and you absolutely cannot imagine your life without that person.... That is love. When you find someone who is honest with you about even your worst attributes and you still can't imagine life without them... That is love. When you bring a new life into the world together and it turns your world upside down, but you still can't imagine life with anyone else... That is LOVE. There are many things that I love about my husband, but the one thing, above all else, that I love is that he teaches me daily how to love more than already know how. So for that, I believe, that Casey is my first TRUE love.

Casey Deree Pruitt, I love with with my whole heart and I can't imagine my life without you. Thank you for putting up with me every day and loving me back.

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